Forty Nine

I am trapped.

I am barricaded between these six formidable walls - four around me, one beneath and one above. Their unforgiving nature has somehow led me to lose myself within their intimidating boundaries and now, even though you're gone, all that's left in this room is you. Your fragrance, your mind-set, your voice. They chase me and their echo haunts my intangible hope for sanity.

Counterfeit tales of reassurance and false confessions are scattered on the floor among delicately wrapped gift boxes of empty promises that I trip on from time to time.

I can still taste the bitterness as I breathe in the essence of your mistakes.

I found your infamous hidden agenda under my bed, written in secret by all the saccharine thoughts that devoured your mind. I was guided to it by an evil disposition of your scent which still lingers within the obscurities of my embarrassing world. It turned me inside out and upside down as I wandered through wonder and frustration that tampered with my frigid conscience.

In all your self-proclaimed excellence you overlooked the terrible habits of convenience that control the temperament of indolence you are forced to live by. And I, in my daring curiosity, never would have imagined the incredible tigress downfall of such a graceless transition.

Words of apprehension that I swallowed fearfully have been baking inside me and are burning all that remains of my carnal being. This emotional reflux has me itching for a solution, a resolution, a revolution.

But I'm still trapped.

For obvious reasons, I've been failing to rip off all the detachment-phobic layers you dressed me in. Fury has persuaded me to develop such a sharp aversion to the adversity you unknowingly enforce. It was trust, not love, that was blind in the end.

But reality shed light to unveil the fact that your inseparable existence is no longer wrapped in satin candor. Although I am indefinitely marred, I am indifferent. On the horizon there is an imminent sensation waiting patiently for my liberation; A donor of peace of mind, and of a genuine appreciation while speaking faint words of distinctive meaning.

My idle mind will rest.